Friday, July 27, 2007

Canned Wisdom IV

• “I have learnt to sit on my emotions”- Myselo
• “So what is a hunch? The ability to reach accurate conclusions with limited information? Some call it a sixth sense. Others say it’s a gut feeling. Most researchers prefer to label it intuition”
• People who eat natural foods die of natural causes
• A politician will always be there when he needs you
• If everyone else has a flu vaccination, you don’t need one
• Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment- Ian Walsh in interview
• “A person with great talents but without good manners is like someone with bags full of gold who has no small change for his daily needs”- H. Witvoet
• “The greatest right in the world is the right to be wrong”- Harry Weinberger
• “Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth”- Peter Ustinov
• “The game of life is a game of boomerangs. Our thoughts, deeds and works return to us sooner or later, with astounding accuracy”- Florence Scovel Shihn

Who is the Jogoo?

A recent Sunday Nation’s editorial got my attention with the quote that, “Fifty years ago, the typical image of a father in many traditional Kenyan societies was a sullen tyrant, never spoken to by a child or, heaven forbid, a woman, quietly counting his cows in his smoky hut. The modern Kenyan father is a guy who does his nails on Wednesdays, goes for anger therapy on Thursdays and governs through “family meetings” at which his daughters have as much say as anyone else and whose (lack of) authority is the worst kept secret of our times.”

The quotation reminded me of a friend from college days whose oft-repeated clarion call when dealing with the fair sex was that, “women have no place in our homestead”. I wonder how he fared in his endeavour to keep his homestead away from contamination.

It also brought to mind another friend whose only defense in the face of his “demanding” wife and daughter is the question-“who wears pants in this house?” The ladies usual answer is that even the house help does wear trousers and hence wearing trousers would not be equated to wearing any authority. My friend has retreated to meek whispers directed at he wife, out of his children’s earshot, with the rhetorical question; “who pees while standing in this house?”

Today, the man’s place in the family hierarchy is endangered. No one takes his authority seriously. He has become a doormat, a sofa to be sat on by all and sundry. All that talk about the head being superior to the neck is meant to hoodwink men into thinking that they are in charge. Even the oft-quoted phrase of women being the “weaker sex” is another gimmick engineered by the ladies to keep men imagining that they are the stronger gender. If you want to expose the ladies’ craving for power, watch them glee at the mention that they are the “power behind the throne” or the universal recognition that “behind every successful man there is a woman”.

So who carries real authority? Could it be the “stranger” Wanyoro, (wife to Riverwood comedian Machang’i), whom as the screen husband wonders aloud, can be so willing to drop her father’s name and adopt yours? The one who rushes out to join your siblings when a family photo of your brothers and sisters is called out!

At a recent seminar, an advocate of women’s power told us that women are not ordinary. You have to have some special powers if you can leave all that you are familiar with to cross borders, oceans, tribe, community, religious and language barriers to be with the one you love! You have to be strong. Very strong.

There is consensus over the years, and despite what the men may think, it’s an open secret out there that the “weaker” gender is not as feeble as many men are wont to imagine. I fully concur with the wise guys from days gone by that:-


“The hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world”-WR Wallace

“Women run to extremes; they are either better or worse than men”-La Bruyere, Les Caracteres

“The female of the species is more deadly than the male”- Rudyard Kipling

“Women never reason, and therefore they are (comparatively) seldom wrong”- William Hazlitt

“Women are very pleased when you call them cruel”- PAC deBeaumerchais, The Barber of Seville

“Disguise our bondage as we will
‘Tis woman, woman, rules us still”
-Thomas Moore, Sovereign Woman

“We cannot all be masters”- Shakespeare, Othello I

Like a moth drawn to the certain death of a light, men continue to beat a path to the doors and hearts of our womenfolk, certain that the flirting lights camouflage a deadly fire that means physical and emotional harm. Aren’t all male caught in a quagmire. You cannot live with women and neither can you live without them! But hey, what would be the substitute?

“I think it can be stated without denial that no man ever saw a man he would be willing to marry if he were a woman”- George Gibbs, How to stay married

Saturday, July 21, 2007

A Common Sense Approach To Life & Business

This morning I spent two hours tapping from the well of anectodal wisdom that is Mr. Yoshiyuki Sato, the MD of Kenya Nut Company, best known as the guys behind Macadamia nuts, Out of Africa brand of coffee and Aberdares tea brand. Mr. Sato was the guest speaker at the British Council's monthly Leadership Forum. "Personal Development: Critical Success Factors" was the subject, but he did more than that. Sato, who started and revolutionised the macadamia industry has a wicked sense of humor characterised by a self-effacing view of his abilities. But dont be fooled. Here is a man, who 33 years ago was able to convince the government that he could be the driver of the industry. According to a report he has co-authored with JGH Waithaka, his start-up, Kenya Nut was "appointed by the Kenya Government to spearhead and invest in the development of the macadamia nut industry in Kenya. The company immediately followed up the trees previously planted in the field totalling about 800,000, all but very few based on un-grafted materials, and encouraged owners to look after them and sell the nuts-in-shell to the Company. Simultaneously the company established a nursery to multiply specific selections previously introduced and locally selected so as to make available the essential planting materials. The Government intervention continued by way of getting bilateral aid from the Government of Japan to construct a macadamia nut research centre, equipment, transport and personnel for conducting research and providing extension services to growers. A training program was also drawn up for Kenyan scientists to relevant universities overseas to learn horticulture, pomology and related specialist subjects. The Kenya Nut Company has since 1975 been responsible for the commercial development of macadamia nut industry in Kenya by multiplying and supplying planting materials, based on selections from the research centre, to potential growers. The company purchases all the nuts-in-shell from growers, processes them and markets the kernels and other by products locally and internationally. The industry growth has been very slow due to financial constraints to meet planting material production according to demand. Research support from public sector i.e. the Kenya Agricultural Research Institute has been inadequate and a number of diseases and pests of the macadamia nut are causing economic damage. The industry is not threatened by this situation but its growth may be slowed even further. Recently other commercial participants have entered the macadamia nut industry by putting up small processing facilities but are not involved in crop development activities. Farmers needs for planting materials, husbandry knowledge and crop management on the farm are not being met fully because Kenya Nut Company has very limited resources for these aspects. It has spent over K.Shs. 600 million in developing very modern processing/manufacturing facilities, commands a world wide market and maintains a very efficient marketing system which could market much larger quantities than are available annually at present. Present Status: The Kenya macadamia nut industry is currently made of approximately 900,000 trees of varying ages from one year to 20 years, grown by over 100,000 small scale farmers with an average of 6 - 12 trees per grower. Annual production is about 4,000 metric tons of nuts-in-shell. These produce about 800 metric tons of marketable kernels, making the main commercial product. Other by products such as oil, are minimal. The future is bright because world demand could take over 20,000 metric tons of kernels per year. At the current price of K.Shs. 23/- per kg of nuts-in-shell the producers are getting Shs. 92 million per year." According to Sato, success is over-dramatised! You can learn more from failure than from success. One's critical success factor should be NOT TO FAIL! It is easier to learn why we fail, than why we succeed. Having come to Kenya to set up Toray (K) Ltd, a high-tech textile factory in Thika that was riding on the government's policy of import substitution, its failure ten years later taught him to start small and grow. He admires Julius Ceaser's management style built around the belief that if you put the right man in the right place, everybody is useful and more will be achieved. Ceaser succeeded because Romans trusted his vision and supported him. A leader must be clear about what kind of leader he wants to be. Having grown up in grinding poverty(had to eat grasshoppers for lunch) in post-war Japan, he drew six decade-long plans that would guide him:- Teens were driven by a desire to be in physical shape, 20s to set goals, 30s put in effort to achieve the goals, 40s await the results of the effort, 50s should develop based on the results and 60s to enjoy the fruits of his labour. Now in his late 60s, he is enjoying "bonus" years and looking forward to setting another six decades plan to see him to his 120 birthday. Cheekily, he hopes his wife can now allow him to have some girlfriends on the side! Widely travelled, he studied Urdu, Arabic, Persian, French and English in Toyko University. A book by Kwame Nkurumah motivated a desire to meet the author which saw him join Accra University and eventually meet most of the African independence leaders during a conference including Nkurumah, Nasser, Senghor, Balewa, etc. It was therefore natural for him to be sent by Toray to Kenya to start the textile factory. Today, his company employs 4000 and works with 50,000 farmers as suppliers. Kenya Nut is ranked as the No. 3 such factory in the world. For 20 years, the company did not pay any dividends and ploughed back all profits to development. His motivation was not profit, but growth and development. He has since diversified to cashew nuts, coffee and tea. Proud of their 3 year contract ot supply British Airways with in-flight snacks. His biggest regret is a failed venture in Brazil. He trusted his managers on the ground without any contracts. Though he wishes he could do business based on trust, common sense has taught him that you will burn your fingers if you trust people all the time. He should have put some contracts in place. In hindsightI. f you are guided by common sense he says you will be saved a lot of nonsense in your personal life as well as in business. Qoutable quotes Where there is a dream, there is a goal Where there is a goal, there is effort Where there is effort, there will be achievement. Its common sense he says. My take: Mr. Sato is more than you see. I believe he has some good lessons on how we can brand Kenyan agricultural products for markets out there. Close to four decades in Kenya should have earned him a place in one of the lately-in-vogue think tanks. His insight and experience is under utilised. I always associated Kenya Nut with local businessman Pius Ngugi, who is also associated with the local Volvo dealership, Esther Passaris and coffee plantations in Thika. The more you know, the more you dont......

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Tusker

This is a forward I got the other day and thought it’s a creative way of expressing the admiration that Kenyans have for their favourite beer… Tusker Milele Baba yetu Uliye brewer Beer zako zitufikie,niitakayo unipatie Bei yake iwe hapa kwa bar kama huko AFCO utupe chupa zetu Za kila siku Utusamehe sisi walevi Kama tunavyosamehe wasiolewa Tusijenge keja mbali na bar, iwe karibu na butchery Kwa kuwa beer zote ni zako Na wines hata spirits, Milele,Milele na Tusker Amen

Crystal Ball on Kenyan Politics

Another forward on predictions… I don’t know the source, but makes some interesting reading. I know that not all predictions will come to pass, but I have a feeling one or two may just happen. We don’t have too long to wait ……………… Predictions Regarding Politics in Kenya. 1. Kibaki will run again for presidency. Despite all his efforts and the wishes of his kitchen cabinet, he will lose the December election by a wide margin. 2. KANU will re-emerge as a formidable force, as Kalonzo Musyoka runs as her torch bearer. 3. Prior to this, Kalonzo Musyoka will leave ODM-K with the excuse that the primaries were not democratic. 4 . Prior to this Raila Odinga will win the ODM-K primaries and run as her presidential candidate. 5. Prior to this, Uhuru Kenyatta and Nicholas Biwott will be reconciled by Daniel T. Moi, who will also prevail on them to woo Kalonzo back as the torch bearer. In real time, predictions 3 and 4 have already happened. (Remember that the only reason Kalonzo left KANU was due to the failed 'Uhuru Project.' Moi always believed that his tribe should not rule soon after his reign. For his own comfort, he tried Uhuru and there was disaster. Mudavadi is now a principled man, and will not go back to KANU. Indeed Kalonzo believed he could be president even before KANU swallowed 'Tractor.' Moi is still a master planner and has learned from his blunder. He has said "Kalonzo Tosha!" Uhuru has agreed. In calling the KANU delegates conference to converge in a few hours, UHURU is about to save his face, lest people conclude he never matured. It was assumed that he had become his own man when he disregarded Moi's advice and led KANU into ODM-K. 6. Ruto, Mudavadi, Balala will stay in ODM-K. Others more will stay. 7. Charity Ngilu and Paul Muite and others will join ODM-K and will not run for the presidency. 8. Raphael Tuju, Joseph Kamotho, Uhuru Kenyatta, Charity Ngilu and Musikari Kombo will not win elections in their constituencies. Muite will be the only one to win as an MP who is not pro Narc-K in Central province. 9. The sun will set on Kenya's 2nd president. He will not live to see how KANU fared in the next elections. 10. There will not be a clear winner in the December elections between Raila Odinga of ODM-K, and Kalonzo Musyoka of KANU. NARC-K will be a distant 3rd. unfortunately the decision will be made by the High Court of Kenya. 11. On the brighter side, Kenya will have her first Prime Minister next year. It will be a woman. (Her name was revealed to me but it is this part that is not clear) 12. Generally between June and August, the wildebeest congregate and prepare to cross the famous Grumeti River to enter Kenya's Masai Mara. Some do not make it. Likewise, the politicians are in a similar situation. The first defection has already taken place and benefitedNARC-K, the second DP. Most defections will not make an impact except one.There will be three more by next weekend.

Friday, June 29, 2007

Canned Wisdom III

More from my collection of quotations ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ · “Experience is the name man gives to his mistakes”- Oscar Wilde
· “I was born with all the instincts and the senses of primitive man; tempered by the arguments and the restraints of a civilized being”- Guy Maupassant Love · “I know that in writing English I make errors in grammar and my vocabulary is limited. I try to better my diction, improve my syntax and endeavour to turn out a polished sentence which is at once pregnant with meaning and pleasing to the ear. With me English is a passion. No other language gives me quite the same pleasure. I find it more musical and much richer in its literature than any other language of the world ”- Khuswant Singh in We Indians
· “Bernard Shaw was absolutely right when he said that marriage without mutuality is nothing but legalized prostitution”- Vasant Sathe in Times of India
· “The children of today do not obey their elders. What will happen to our society?...The price of grain is so high that people find it difficult to feed their families”. The above quotations are from 4500-year old clay tablets found in Mesopotamia. Who said nothing is permanent?”- Brajendra Singh answering the question why is nothing permanent except change?
· “You can only learn if you listen. And listening is an act of silence; it is only the mind that is not only very quiet, but tremendously active that can learn”- J. Krisnamurti
· “Yesterday is beyond repair. Tomorrow may never come. Today alone is ours. Make the best use of it as it is your sole, sure possession” – Zarathushtra
· “It has always been a mystery to me how men can feel themselves honoured by the humiliation of their fellow beings”-Mahatma Gandhi · “The only people who take life seriously are doctors”- Jared
· “Nobody said life would be fair”- John B

Goodbye to Sugar, Fat, Sodium & Welcome Activity

I recently got to weigh my sorry ass and was shocked by the reading! How could I have added a whole 7 kgs in one year? The last time I was on a self-imposed weigh loss programme, I shed some 3kgs in a period of four months and I was feeling great. In celebration, I let the foot off the pedal and see what happened! Close to 2 years ago, I started on a health regime, which I christened Overcome 2005. It was so beneficial that I deeply regret never following it throug. I was feeling so good that I may have wrongly concluded that no more work was needed. Below I share with you the first and last entries I made into my Overcome Diary. Now that I am back on a new regime, I hope to keep a diary of my progress and share with you. "7th November 2005 I have blamed my environment, my genes, my wife, my bad habits, my sweet tooth and everything else for my weighty condition. However, while busy playing hide and seek with my conscious, I realize I cannot run away from the small voice telling me that my destiny is in my hands and am the only one who can do something about it. When? How? At about 115 kgs, 38 years old and running out of clothes to wear, it’s about time I did something. And guess what? I did something about it, though it was not planned, I found myself nudged towards the dark staircase by a blackout as I reported to work today. My office is on 9th floor and with a two-floor mezzanine; I consider that to be 11 floors. To get through each floor, you have to clear 20 steps and I think I have found a new exercise regime with 220 steps. I have also found a new resolve to take my health and mental well being to the next level upwards. I have been through this road before. I have been on a diet; I have brainstormed with my wife, friends, relatives on my weight. I have watched and observed other people’s health woes. I was diagnosed with stress some 10 years ago. I overcame. I was warned about a borderline blood pressure. I overcame. I know a lot about the dangers of obesity. I know a lot about the dangers of cholesterol. I know enough about hypertension. I know what causes a heart attack. I know what to do to avoid one. I was a heavy smoker for 15 years (about 27,000 cigarettes) and managed to quit 7 months ago. I know something about factors that affect life expectancy in my environment. I know I desire to see my grandchildren. In fact I desire to grow old and be a nuisance to my children. Payback time maybe! I want to attend the 2030 World Cup finals in person and watch the 2042 finals on whatever gadget will be in vogue then. The blackout today was just the trigger I have been waiting for. Maybe it’s more than just a trigger. Maybe I just run out of excuses on why I have done nothing about my weight. Not enough money to join the gym, no time from my demanding job, no time from my demanding social calendar. But guess what, I do get enough time every week to borrow and watch at least 4 movies. I have a never-miss ritual of linking up with the boys every Friday to bar hop and binge till the wee hours. Wednesdays, Saturdays, holidays are a convenient excuse to indulge in my favourite pastime called the tipple. I religiously sit to watch the English Premiership, Formula One, Champions League, Olympics, World Cup Rugby, Cricket, Soccer or whatever is on season. I diligently seat on my desk from eight to five in the name of being a good worker, but observe a high redundancy on health grounds all around me. You get cancer, hypertension, diabetes, etc and they will find an excuse to send you home! I have therefore decided to document sights, sounds, tastes, scents and the feel of my meek effort to overcome a small problem that to me has a grave implication on more than just my life. I will start by logging all the physical exertions I get out of my lazy bones and all the foods I gorge into this miserable sack of a body that I carry! I also hope to create an exercise regime and diet plan that will be within my ability for the rest of my life today. I will share with you my thoughts not as an invitation to “voyeur” my life, laugh at my weakness, pity my efforts, and justify your supremacy over my unlikely predicaments. I invite you to be the silent mirror that sees all and says nothing. I invite you as a guardian angel that gets disgusted at all our follies and rejoices at our redeeming moments without ever passing judgment. Welcome.

Below are some of the loose targets that I set myself on this journey. 36 inch waistline 85 kilogrammes 220 steps in 5 minutes 8 hours sleep everyday- no more no less Create health awareness in the family Learn how to swim- 12 months Learn how to play golf- 3 years Learn how to meditate Learn yoga Walk 10 kilometers every week Fall in love with the outdoors, camp, hike, ride" Know more foods and their benefits to my body

Friday, June 22, 2007

Canned Wisdom II

More of my wisdom collection.
· “When a man writes his autobiography he is expected to show a certain modesty, but when a nation writes its autobiography there is no limit to its boasting and vainglory”-Bertrand Russell in Skeptical Essays Free thought and official propaganda on national glorification in school text books of history
· “The past should be a springboard, not a hammock”- Ivern Ball
· “To believe with certainty, we must begin with doubting”- Stanislaus I
· “We do not remember days; we remember moments ”- Cesare Pavese in The Burning Brand
· “Don’t approach a goat from the front, a horse from the back or a fool from any side”- Yiddish proverb
· “Lord, where we are wrong, make us willing to change; where we are right, make us easy to live with”- Peter Marshall
· “Life affords no greater responsibility, no greater privilege than the raising of the next generation”-C. Everett Koop, MD
· “We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine”- Eduardo Galeano’s The Book of Embraces
· “Words of comfort, skillfully administered, are the oldest therapy known to man”- Louis Nizer
· “Children aren’t happy with nothing to ignore. And that’s what parents were created for”- Ogden Nash

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Canned Wisdom

In a previous post, I talked of my son Gregory and his coin collecting. What I did not mention, but you may have gathered was that I am a collector’s collector. I collect lots of stuff- the coins I reluctantly handed over to my son, quotations, mchongoanos, books, etc. Today I want to share with you some quotations that I have collected over the years. Why do I collect quotes? For me they summarize lots of stuff into sizeable tablets that one can pick and consume at appropriate times of need. Instead of reading a whole book, one quotation is enough to tell you what the moral of the story is…….. “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavours to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unimagined in common hours”- Robert De Niro’s Maxim

To entertain some people, all you have to do is listen

“Pain is what you measure pleasure (with) by”-Tibetian saying

“Suffering is the first step towards liberation”- Dalai Lama

“When you have an itch, you scratch. But not to itch at all is better than any amount of scratching”- Nagarjuna (Indian scholar on celibacy, sexual satisfaction)

Life is fragile, Handle it with Prayer

“I don’t believe in love. It doesn’t exist in my philosophy. There is no such thing as love. If I am not unkind to my parents it is because of gratitude and nothing else. If I get a wife I shall not wrench her hand or swear at her, because it would be indecent. That is all the motive for a lot of habitual decent behaviour we see which we call love. There is no such thing as love”-Chandran (In RK Narayan’s The Bachelor of Arts)

“Writing is a prestigious profession which puts one right into the center of the world and to remain on top, one has to work really hard, the aim being a good and original theme, simplicity in expression and the use of the irreplaceable word”- Nelson Mandela (In a letter to daughter Zindzi)

The poet seeks it in verse The politician in foundation stones The reporter in bylines -Immortality

Social Day Out

During the recent long weekend, my investment group of 19 members decided to take the families out for some inter family mingling. The basic criterion to join this seven-year-old all male group is friendship. You must be a good friend of at least four of the existing members. In trying times that friendship has been the saving grace. With four members overseas and one in Mombasa, the other fourteen members get together for formal meeting once a month and socially every other weekend. In our calendar of events, we aim to have at least four annual dates for the spouses and children. There is a Valentine dinner for the ladies only, an all-family weekend during the Tusker Safari Sevens weekend and another one lunch for all. Apart from these occasions, we also get a chance to meet as families during another three outings under the banner of our community and charity activities. We have developed a partnership with a children’s home in the Lukenya area of Athi river area, which sees us going “out” of town as a unit. During the recent outing, we had booked a lodge on the outskirts of the city for a group lunch complete with a full goat choma. The venue was excellent. Set on the river bank of the Athi river, it was serene even as one enjoyed the sense of “wildness” that the uninhabited savannah plains imposed. With 32 children in the fraternity, the focus of such gatherings is usually centered on ensuring that the kids are happy. So as is usual, the fathers were outdoing each other in trying to impress the young ones. The ladies were busy catching up since they don’t interact as regularly as the men. In a week’s time, the group gets together at the safari sevens for the Sunday family outing. This is mostly a fathers and babies outing since most of the ladies are not very keen on the rugby scene. The weekend after that, we are off to Limuru Club for a Sunday lunch courtesy of one member’s generosity. I know this one will be an interesting one since members, spouses and kids are all coming. In the years we have been together as a group, no one can fault us for lack of socializing. As individuals we know how to entertain and as a group we sure know how to have ourselves a good time. In fact we have seen many different parts of the country in the last six years under the pretext of attending our AGM in quiet surroundings. In the next two or so years, we hope to take the AGM out of the country. Despite the group’s penchant for good times, a big challenge exists of how else the members can be beneficial to each other and to the group. Coming from diverse backgrounds and careers, have we realized that this wonderful group is a network that can be utilized for business and therefore material gains? We are sitting on a goldmine, but for as long as the party continues; it will be hard to see the gold dust that lies on our feet.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Gregory turns eight

I am not crazy about celebrating special days, with the exemption of those of my immediate family. My son Gregory turned eight years yesterday and we will celebrate the day with a belated dinner on Saturday. This was agreed weeks in advance and I therefore felt ambushed when on the eve of his birthday, he led a delegation that comprised his sister Natasha and mother Georgina with a request for some snacks to take to school.

Being outnumbered I reluctantly agreed to the request. A box of biscuits and a packet of sweets were procured from the local supermarket. Seems it was all worth the cost because in the evening, he was overly exited about how the day went and how his friends perceived him. Seeing how happy he was, I couldn’t help but shared in his joy.

A precedent having been set, and with Natasha’s own fourth birthday coming up in August, I fear that it will be hard to stop this double celebration of birthdays at home and at school. I cannot help thinking how lucky these kids are. In my day, a casual reminder at dinner that; “oh, by the way you turned ten years today”, was all the birthday that one got. Our only big day was Christmas during which a new set of clothes and shoes were customary. If anything else happened in the course of the year, you were very lucky.

How times have changed.

Glamping

The Newsweek’s (May 28th) The Good Life page reports an emerging camping trend. Called Glamping, short for glamorous camping, this trend was started in Britain by the likes of Kate Moss and Sienna Miller, who would combine mud proof Wellies and couture mini dresses at festivals like Glastonbury.

Vendors have responded with a range of products including floral tent pegs, tents with 12-volt power outlets for laptops, gaming consoles and hair dryers. In Hawaii, the Molokai Ranch offers 40 “tentalows” with solar energy providing modern conveniences.

Though camping is best enjoyed in its rustic and basic variant, I wonder what one could call our own luxurious tented camps, which are known to offer six-star service with all conceivable creature comforts.

I love basic camping. I also love being occasionally pampered in a proper establishment. Mixing the two does not augur well with me.

Monday, June 11, 2007

Maasai Moranism as a product

Recently while on a visit to Mombasa, I came face to face with a phenomena that I have have heard and read about- the Moran gigolo. I was at the Likoni branch of Nakumatt when this lanky brother appeared in my aisle pushing a cart. His manner of dress was eye-catching: he tied a screaming red kikoy around his waist, complete with a Moran’s tools of trade- sheathed sword and rungu- fastened on his belt. Also hanging from his waist was a pouch holding a mobile phone. He wore the now-famous tyre sandles complete with a beaded “aerial”. His upper body was however adorned in a red Arsenal shirt that seemed out of place with the rest of his attire. He was eye-catching which got me curious. Was he the real Moran or an imposter? After all, there were stories of young men from different communities masquerading as morans in the full moran regalia. On his side was a middle-aged white lady who wore a smug smile of satisfaction on her sun-burnt face. While they glided out of my curious sight, I wished my curiosity had been satisfied.

A few days later while traveling between Mombasa and Voi in a local bus, a true moran with his wife and a sick baby strapped on her back, boarded the bus at Mazeras. The lady was dressed in a blue shuka that left a big gaping opening on her right side which exposed her unsecured breasts to the whole groping world. The husband who had the authentic caked ochre & braided hairstyle was in a heavy jacket and knee-long shuka and yellow Sandak sandles. His wife was barefoot and unshielded from the uncharacteristic cold and wet weather that was prevailing in the coast recently. This couple got me comparing and contrasting their realities with the supermarket duo. One was the genuine item, simply living his life the only way he knew how; while the other had packaged himself to meet a market need.

Do I have a right to harshly judge our imposter brother? If he did not respond to the tourist’s desire to experience the “tribal” Africa at close quarters, someone else would easily fill that void.

DSTv Running Scared of Gateway

The reality of formidable competition in the local satellite TV market is here with us. In a full page advert, Gateway TV cheekily declared the “right” to entertainment for African televison sets in “The TV Bill of Rights”. Also in the Gateway advertising arsenal is a mix of radio commercials and outdoor billboards. The new service slated for a simultaneous East African launch on 29th June has got the eleven year old Multichoice Kenya’s DSTv running scared.

The recently introduced a third product for the Kenyan market called the DSTv Family package, obviously in response to the planned entrance, Gateway. Some time last year DSTv had introduced the Compact package of 24 channels for 25 dollars that compared favourably with the flagship product of 43 dollars offering over 50 channels to Kenyans.

GTv have been quoted in the media promising about 20 channels including the all time Kenyan favourite TV product in the name of English Premier League that runs between August and May every year. They wish to price their product at about 20 dollars aiming to capture the 35 million strong middle class of the East African region.

My grouse with DSTv is the fact that they have acted as a true monopoly in this market. For instance the Compact package with more premium channels is priced at about 990 shillings in South Africa. Even their Premium Bouquet is priced at over 40% cheaper in Tanzania. What is it with our market that gets every vendor on an exploitative mode? Is it our taxation regime? Is it the cost of doing business here? Whatever the explanation, I don’t think it will make sense to me.

In any case, the Family Package is really a waste of time because the channels offered may not be satisfactory to any of the following viewers:-

The sports buff who can only view Supersport 4 , which gives you ten minutes updates of events that are shown live on the other Super sport channels. Supersport Select is not any different from the Club programming that is on citizen TV lately- showing lots of not-so memorable matches from the past.

The Movie Fan is left out of Family Package, which has no dedicated movies’ channel apart from Action X and Africa Magic. The former is aired at ungodly hours while the latter is a 24hours West African badly produced movies channel. At least the Compact had the Hallmark Channel with its “soft” themed old movies on offer.

For the kids, there is Boomerang, which shows old cartoons as opposed to the ones most young kids are familiar with on Carton Network as seen on, free to air channels.

The Reality buff is only given Reality Zone and National Geographic and denied Animal Planet, Discovery and History Channel from the main bouquet.

For News fans, I think it’s an insult to be given BBC and Al Jazeera, which already proliferate the free channels. At least an addition of either Sky TV or CNN would have made sense.

Music buffs are also snubbed because Channel O is already available for more that 8 hours on free channels. It is especially insulting when you know that they don’t think you worthy of say MTV, MTV Base or Trace. As for the DMX Music channels, I don’t know of anyone who use their TVs to listen to music or radio!

The other 12 of the 20 channels are really not of any use to the average Kenyan “Family”. Who wants to watch the French TV5Monde, Portuguese RTP International, Chinese CCTV in French or the Italian Rai International? Supersport Active and PlayJam are interactive channels that keep you informed on offerings in the other Supersport Channels (that you don’t have) and interactive computer games for kids respectively. Rhema is a Sunday only Christian channel. CNBC is a business specialist channels that can hardly be recommended “family” viewing nor is Mindset learn that is a channels dedicated to teaching South African children math and sciences.

Whereas I have nothing against market segmentation based on needs and ability to pay, I think it is wrong to hoodwink consumers into paying 19 dollars a month for 8 average channels and another 12 useless channels. That is not acceptable for a Nairobi viewer who is already getting 9 free channels, all almost for 24 hours. DSTv has exploited the prestige that satellite TV is associated with to take advantage of their monopolistic position in the market to rake in abnormal profits by over pricing their products.

I am sure Multichoice Kenya could have increased their subscribers tenfold if they had priced their products as follows:- many so called middle class Kenyans would have no problem paying 11 dollars for DSTv Family or 15 dollars for DSTv Compact with the additional Supersport 3 and one more MovieMagic channel. The DSTv Bouquet can continue to be charged at 43 dollars and you can load onto it all the music, radio, gaming, and foreign language, alternative lifestyle channels that you wish. I am sure there are Kenyans out there who have the time and inclination to watch all those channels.

I have been a consumer of DSTv for a while now, mainly due to my love for cricket and documentaries and pressure from my children. I have an arrangement with the kids, of upgrading to the full Premium Bouquet over the April, August and December holidays and the Compact over the rest of the months. The last one month, I declined to renew the subscription because no one seems to watch it during these periods. The kids are caught in the homework web on weekdays; the parents get home late on almost all weekdays. The weekends are errand time, visiting time and generally entertaining visitors. The kids have to clear weekend homework and still find time to play with their neighbourhood’s pals. So why should I continue paying 25 dollars to keep the house help entertained with Nigerian movies?

I am waiting for Gateway TV to change my thinking soon.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Mungiki & The Science of Vacuums

The whole country is caught in Mungiki frenzy. All news channels are full of reports on the war between the sect and government agencies. But who are Mungiki and how do they impact the national psyche? Mungiki is more than a security issue. Mungiki touches on every facet of our national life and goes to the very fabric that holds us together or threatens to tear the nation apart. There are lessons to be adduced from this phenomenon.

The recent upsurge in macabre activities of the proscribed Mungiki sect have got many Kenyans scared and disturbed that such could be happening in a country with security forces famed for their efficacy

Non-Kikuyus have reason to be wary of the kikuyu nationalism that the proscribed sect seems to subscribe to. They seem to put high premium on “returning” to their old ways by means of reviving abhorrent traditions that include FGM, tobacco sniffing, oath taking and the general tribal chauvinism and imagined superiority that comes with the nurturing of such mindset. Ideally all communities should be in touch and proud of their roots, but should exercising that right be seen to interfere and intimidate other communities, then that should be a warning sign.

The factors that contributed to the rise of the sect have been discussed in the public domain at length and variously include unfair distribution of resources like land, the dispossession of the Mau Mau offsprings, the need to counter or contain the tribal clashes of early 90s in the rift valley, the need to rekindle communal sense of belonging or the need to revive Kikuyu traditions encroached on by modern religions and popular culture. Every community will at different times feel under siege from influences beyond their control. Whether a community consciously accepts or resists the external influences is not a destiny that a few men can determine without consulting or involving the masses. There is great danger when a few in society arrogate themselves the role of determining the direction a whole community takes.

When the adherents of Mungiki took control of communal security in some Nairobi slums, I am sure they were well received by the local chiefs and police. After all they were assisting the police and provincial administration to achieve their mandates. Therein lies the danger of government agencies ceding or absconding from their roles. Today Dandora is fabled to be a secure neighbourhood due to the “partnership” between government and Mungiki vigilantes. It is worth noting that Government operates within legal confines that bind everybody. Vigilantes on the other hand operate under a fluid set of rules that are created, practiced and abandoned as the situation requires. It is no surprise therefore that when government agencies cede their functions to vigilantes, it was a matter of time before the innocent provision of communal security grows to extortion for non-adherents and protection of the willing. It follows that yesterday’s Robin Hood could graduate to tomorrow’s Al Capone; dabbling in all manner of illegal activities. Is it by accident that community policing as a concept has largely been misunderstood giving rise to pseudo-criminal gangs working as vigilantes while the local security machinery turn the other side and feign ignorance of such an arrangement.

Having attained independence at the peak of the cold war, Kenya was never given a chance to establish a homegrown wealth distribution system, we were pre-destined to follow in our colonial master’s footsteps and adopt the winner-takes-all capitalist philosophy as a way of life. We quickly re-defined the fundamentals of capitalism by injecting a little homegrown dose of the grabbing syndrome and a-man-eateth-from-the-tree-he-watcheth philosophy that saw the rise of an acceptable brand of corruption that cut across all public and private institutions. How sustainable his practice would be, was tested by dwindling public resources and a widening rift between the haves and have nots. The resounding loss that KANU suffered in 2002 was a clear testimony that the masses were fed up with this way of life. As to whether the NARC regime read and understood the mood of the people is debatable. Is Mungiki a reaction to this shameful state of affairs? Is a nation of 30,000 millionaires and 30 million paupers viable? Should we be dismayed that the masses are trying to emulate the moneyed.

Violence in politics is a widely accepted occurrence in Kenya. Many a politician are not averse to owning and controlling their own gang of goons for use when need arises. If there is any number of politicians from Central Kenya that are today associated with Mungiki, such a relationship would invariably be seen in that light. The media has gleefully reported, complete with video clips, the two demonstrations that that Mungiki took to Uhuru Park and Harambee Avenue as a show of support for two different political parties over a period of three years; clearly showing that political thugs owe their allegiance to no one in particular, but to the pied piper. There are numerous politicians today regretting their flirtation with the sect. As a nation, we however need to look at the bigger picture and say so to political violence by enacting specific laws that outlaw such practices and therefore the need for gangs-for-hire. The government has absconded from provision of security in political rallies unless they are government-friendly rallies. This vacuum has been filled by Mungiki–type outfits all over the country.

Back to the economics and politics of wealth distribution, Mungiki has metamorphosed into a hydra-headed monster that easily reads economic trends with a view to exploiting them. This is how they got involved in reaping from the boom that Michuki rules instigated in the matatu sector. Although the government wont take advice from pedestrian commentators, it is obvious that the only to keep the sect and other groups with similar motivations out of transport businesses is to formalize the sector into organizations like the NENO, Akamba, Kenya Bus, Citi Hoppa, etc. Get cash out of the trade and you will have controlled them.

The recent released economic survey credited some of the growth to consumerism as expounded by an upsurge in super markets and mega-marts all over the place. TheMungiki must have seen this trend long before the treasury mandarins saw it coming. How do you explain the entry of theMungiki into the hawking business in the CBD? It was widely reported that all the lucrative streets were partitioned and would be availed to genuine hawkers at a fee. That fee guaranteed unfettered access to the customers free of interference from Council Askaris and with protection by the street “owners”. Is it a wonder that confrontations between this “street lords” and the authorities ended with death and destruction.

In other booming sectors of the economy like construction and the natural offshoot of property management, it is romoured that today you cannot freely undertake construction on your plot without a little supervision and management from the local toughies. They offer you their own fundis (who will pay some agency fee for getting the job) while your materials suppliers/transporters are also “levied” for venturing into the Mungiki “territory”. As soon as the goons have facilitated the project, they offer their property management services by collecting your rent for a commission or in exchange for free room in one of your units. The most ridiculous manifestation of the sect is the now common cases of fees levied to town-based farmers with parcels of land upcountry by local goons for “watching” their farms in their absence.

You are wrong if you imagine that the Mungiki menace just happened on the country. This is a phenomena that was nurtured with the inadvertent assistance of the state machinery. Until the recent upsurge in cult-like killings, the authorities never took a keen interest in the metamorphosis of the sect. After all they did not seem a threat to anyone and in fact seemed to complement the state in the provision of some services and ensuring peace. It took the courage of a few matatu operators in Kiambu and Maragwa who defied the excessive demand for illegal fees, to ignite the current spate of tit-for-tat killings initially between the sect and defiant transport operators and now between the sect and the police force, provincial administrators and deserters.

When the internal security minister announced some measures to curb the sect, it was curious that one of the measures was that policemen dabbling in the matatu trade would have to choose one of the two callings. At the face value of that requirement, it is hard to see the relationship, but one is forced to conclude complicity on the part of the law enforcers in the collection and sharing of the illegal levies squeezed out of transport operators. Is it possible for a handful of people to collect monies from a fleet of a hundred matatus on a daily basis without the police being in the know? Why would the minister warn his officers away from the trade? One concludes that some officers may have defended their fraternizing with Mungiki as normal interaction between a matatu investor and the ubiquitous route “managers”.

Another observation that is hard to ignore is the lack of any ownership of the sect. Without a known leadership, one deduces that the sect may have fragmented into independent cell-like formations that may not be communicating with each other. Since they all share a common script, it is easy for localized units to survive and operate independently. If that is the practice, then the authorities will have a hard time containing the sect.

Lack of a witness protection programme will also work against the public partnering with the authorities in containing the sect. If it is true that the sect has sympathizers in the disciplined forces as they assert, the suspicion that the public holds against the police will not help matters.

When all is said and done, I have a feeling that events and outcomes surrounding the Mungiki will leave a profound mark on the national psyche and our collective memory. The country may be affected by this current upsurge in more than one way and for a long time. It surely feels like one National Prayer Day is not enough of Kenya.

My Library

Last week, I promised to share my library with you. Listed here below is my current titles:-

Religion/Mythology/Spirituality/Ethics/Philosophy

  1. The Genesis of Religion- Margaret Murray, Routledge & Kegan Paul
  2. Growing up catholic- Mary Jane Frances Cavolina Meara & others, Doubleday/Dolphin
  3. The Holy Bible- Gideons
  4. The Power of a praying parent- Stormie Omartian, Kingsway
  5. Freedom of Religion- Stanley N. Worton, Hayden
  6. The African Bible- Paulines
  7. The power of a praying wife- Stormie Ormatian, Kingsway Publications
  8. Mythology- Edith Hamilton, Mentor
  9. Teachings of Swami Vivekananda-Advaita Ashrama
  10. Outrageous acts & Everyday Rebellions- Gloria Steinem, Holt Rinehart &
  11. Mere Christian-CS Lewis, Collins
  12. Good News by a man named Luke- The Bible Society of Kenya
  13. Neno (Agano Jipya)- International Bible Society
  14. Steps to Christ- Ellen White, Pacific Press
  15. Ethics in a permissive society- William Barclay, Collins
  16. Life- how did it get here?- Watchtower Bible & Tract Society
  17. The Portable Voltaire- Penguin Books

Kenya-Geography, Politics, Literature, Travel

  1. Kenya –Land of opportunity- CBK
  2. JM Kariuki in Parliament- Kareithi Munuhe, Gazelle Books
  3. Guide to Motoring & Tourism in Kenya- Camerapix, AA Kenya
  4. Kenya Trivia- Chrtina Hearne & Nancy Crooks
  5. East Africa, travel survival kit- Lonely Planet
  6. Rough Guide- Kenya

Communications- Media, Advertising, PR, Radio & TV

  1. The complete guide to advertising- Torin Douglas, Macmillan
  2. Language & Style in the press- Barbara Duff & Ramon Shindler, Collins ELT
  3. Growth & Development of the print media in India and Kenya- Dissertation
  4. Broadcast Journalism-Techniques of radio and TV- Andrew Boyd, Focal Press
  5. TheAfrican Newsroom- Frank Burton, IPI
  6. Social Survey Research & Statistics- K. Singh, Prakashan Kendra
  7. Into the newsroom-Leonard Teel & Ron Taylor, Prentice Hall
  8. The Journalist’s Handbook- MV Kamath, Vikas
  9. Professional Journalism- MV Kamath, Vikas
  10. Journey into journalism- Arnold Wesker, Writers & Readers
  11. The Feature Writer’s Handbook- Stewart Harral, Norwan
  12. Applications Communications- James Payne, Clark Publishing
  13. Advertising made simple- Frank Jefkins, Rupa
  14. Modern Sub-editing- titus Ogunwale, Penman’s Media
  15. Theory and Pracice of Journalism- BN Ahuja, Surjeet Publications

Fitness/Health/Food

  1. Fat-burner work out- Chrissie Gallagher-Mundy, Struik
  2. Why die of heart disease?- Ted Kavanagh, George G. Harrap
  3. Coping with the common cold- Wendy Murphy, time-life books
  4. The new seasoning- Graham Kerr, Sphere books

India

  1. Guide for Kenyan students- KIFA
  2. We Indians- Kushwant Singh, Orient Paperbacks

Biographies/Autobiographies & Memoirs

  1. Childhood- Maxim Gorky
  2. My apprenticeship, my universities- Maxim Gorky, Progress
  3. The autobiography of Bertrand Russell, Bantam
  4. Nicholas & Alexandra- Robert K. Massie, Pan
  5. The camera never blinks- Dan Rather, Ballantine Books
  6. Papa Hemingway- AE Hotchener, Bantam
  7. Winston Churchill –My early childhood

Reference books/Dictionary/Thesaurus

  1. Roget’s International Thesaurus- Oxford & IBH
  2. Manorama Year Book 1994- Malayala Manorama
  3. The World Almanac 1992- World Almanac
  4. Great Encyclopedic dictionary- Readers Digest

Business/Economics/Investments

  1. The economics of Public Issues- Douglas C. North & Roger Leroy Miller, Harper & Row
  2. How to buy stocks- Louis Engel, Bantam Books
  3. Common Stocks & Uncommon Profits- Phillip A. Fisher, Wiley
  4. E-Business- A beginner’s guide- Robert C. Elsen& toby J. Vette, Osborne

Commentary

  1. Values & Society- Jack L. Nelson, Hayden
  2. Dissent & Protest- D. Naylor, Hayden
  3. Racism & Prejudice- Charles billings, Hayden
  4. Freedom of Assembly & Petition- Stanley N. Worton, Hayden
  5. Freedom of speech & Press- Stanley N. Worton, Hayden

Self-help/DIY

  1. The essentials of First Aid- St. John Ambulance
  2. Not Bosses but leaders- John Adair, Kogan Page
  3. Know yourself through your handwriting- Jane Paterson, RDI
  4. Accident First Aid- VV Yudenich, Mir
  5. How to fly a kite, catch a fish, grow a flower- Alvin Schwartz, Pocket Books
  6. The Bantam Book of correct letter writing- Bantam
  7. How to sell yourself- Arch Lustberg, Career Press
  8. The job ahead- New Rochester Occupational Reading series, SRA

Parenting /Family

  1. The parenting bible- robin Goldstein with Janet Gallant, Sourcebooks Inc
  2. New Baby Book- Better Homes & Gardens
  3. A parent’s guide to bedwetting control- Nathan H Azrin, Pocket
  4. The child- Nancy J. Cobb, Mayfield

Language & Writing /Plays/Quotations

  1. Encounters-S. Gopinathan, Oxford
  2. The blood knot-Athol Fugard, Oxford
  3. Masters of English Prose- Somaiya
  4. Comparison & Criticism- Barbara Stark, Heineman
  5. The short history of English Literature- Emile Legous, Oxford
  6. Strife- John Galsworthy, Surjeet
  7. Handbook of Qoutations- Arthur T. Morgan, GOYL Saab
  8. Roget’s Pocket Thesaurus-CO Sylvester Mawson, Pocket Boks
  9. The new Scriptwriter’s Journal- Mary C. Johnson, focal Press
  10. Writers Inc-Sebranek, Meyer & Kemper, Write Source
  11. How to write and speak better- Readers Digest
  12. Elements of Writing- Holt, Rinehart & Winston, HBJ
  13. Don’t panic-You can have better grammer-Vicki Taylor, Scholastic
  14. Song of Lawino/song of Ocol- Okot p’Bitek, East African Publishing House
  15. Coolie, advanced study companion- Wahome Mutahi, Heineman
  16. Kwani 01- Kwani Trust
  17. Swahili Grammer- EO Ashton, Longman’s/Green & Co.

Humour

  1. Dave Berry Slept Here- Dave Berry, Fawcett Columbine
  2. The Peter Prescription- Dr. Lawrence J. Peter, Bantam
  3. The book of worries- Robert Morley, Pan
  4. Out of Practice- Rob Buckman, Pan

Novels

  1. All things New- Anne Biezanek, Petersmith
  2. Race against Time- Richard Frost, Rex Collings/Transafrica
  3. Looking back in anger- John Osborne
  4. The heart of the lion- Jean Plaidy, Robert Hale-London
  5. The best of friends- Joana Trollope, Black Swan
  6. The call of the wild, white fang & other stories- Jack London, Penguin
  7. Fatal Terrain- Dale Brown, Harper Collins
  8. The Testament- John Grisham, Arrow
  9. The crash of 79- Paul E. Erderman, Sphere
  10. Tell me how long the train’s been gone- James Baldwin, Corgi Books
  11. The empty hand- Louis L’Amour, Corgi Books
  12. The Women’s room- Marilyn French, Sphere
  13. Mayflower Madam- Sidney Biddle Barrows, Ivy Books
  14. The Alchemist- Paulo Coeho, Happer Collins
  15. Go in and sink- Douglas Reeman, Arrow
  16. Patty Jane’s House of Curl- Lorna Landvik, Fawcett Columbine
  17. The day I died- Walter Harris, Star Books
  18. A leaf in the wind- Welda Sherrod, BMI
  19. The secret room of morgate House- Hillary Waugh, double day & Co
  20. Reflex- Dick Francis, Fawcett Crest
  21. The needle’s eye- Margaret Drabble, Penguin Books

Classics

  1. The Complete Works of Shakespeare- University Works
  2. The complete Sherlock Holmes-Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Rupa
  3. The castle- Franz Kafka, Penguin
  4. Gulliver’s Travels- Jonathan Swift, JM Dent & Sons
  5. The adventures of Huckleberry finn- Mark ?Twain, Penguin
  6. Alibaba & Other stories- Angus Maciver, Robert Gibsons & Sons

Photography

124. The young cameraman- Gordon Catling, Nicholas KayeCamera craft- Malcolm Hoare, Blandford 125. How to take winning pictures-Kodak 126. Taking photos- Lu Jeffrey, Piccolo Activity fact book It is very easy to see how my small corner of the book’s world is shaped by a few authors. I am sure there are another twenty or so books that are either hiding around the house or are out with family and friends.

Thursday, May 24, 2007

Imagine

This is one of those poetic, insightful songs that I love. It is especially poignant today as my country Kenya goes through untold violence due to inequalities brought about by a culture of greed and hoarding. Think of our brothers and sisters who are dead in the name of land clashes and mungiki. I have taken the liberty of substituting some of Lennon's words with mine, to localise the song. Imagine there no heaven Its easy if you try No hell below us Above us only sky Imagine all the people Living for today Imagine there’s no country (tribe) It isn’t hard to do Nothing to give or to die for And no religion too Imagine all the people Living life in peace You may say am a dreamer But am not the only one I hope some day you will join us And the world(country) will be as one Imagine no booze sessions I wonder if you can No need for grief or anger A brotherhood of man Imagine all the people Sharing all the world(country) You may say am a dreamer But am not the only one I hope some day you will join us And the world will be as one Imagine all the people Living for today You may say am a dreamer But am not the only one I hope some day you will join us And the world (country)will be as one You may say am a dreamer But am not the only one I hope some day you will join us And the world will be as one. John Lennon

My Books

“I have traveled the world twice over, Met the famous: saints and sinners, Poets and artists, kings and queens, Old stars and hopeful beginners, I have been where on one’s been before, Learned secrets from writers and cooks. All with one library ticket” The wonderful world of books- Janice James Janice James might as well have been talking about me. I love reading. I love books. I glow with delight reading a well crafted book. Wordsmiths are my favourite professionals. If you can play around with everyday words and produce a sentence or phrase that is unique, creative and insightful, I will reward you with a satisfied smile. After completing my studies in India, I was very sure of what I wanted to bring back home with me. It was an easy decision for me. When my peers were busy buying clothes and electronic goods, I knew that 60% of my baggage would be the books I had painstakingly collected during my 5 year stay. Books are relatively cheap in India and easily available. Bookshops are plenty and I remember a choice of at least ten different shops serving varying needs at the university gates. I have been a voracious consumer of the written matter and though I don’t find enough time to read as much as I would want, this minor setback does not deter me from hoarding books for another day. I have not read all the books in my library currently, but I hope for some free time in the future. Apart from buying, I find that in my collection of books, I have about five overdue books that were “borrowed for safe keeping” from some of the schools I attended. I don’t know how this habit will impact on my political ambitions in the future? What would my old school think of me if I offered to return the books 17 years late? Does a book’s amnesty exist in the world of libraries? Years after, I completed school, I continue amassing books. I am a member of at least two libraries, a commercial book exchange, member of the Kenya Book Foundation (not sure of their proper title) who sell donated books at a small “contribution”, an honest borrower from friend’s libraries and a happy customer of at least half the book stores in Nairobi. When a while back Nakumatt started the bookstores within their supermarkets, I would spend long hours browsing through the shelves. When the Media Store was opened at the Junction Mall, my first visit saw me spend at least five thousand on books and music. I was exited that Nairobi had such a shop. I have a deep respect for books and people who value them. I don’t mind sharing access to my book shelf with my friends. Even cyber pals. Next week I promise to share with you all the titles in my shelf now. I will sort them out in the following categories:- Religion/Mythology/Spirituality/Ethics/Philosophy Kenya-Geography, Politics, Literature, Travel Communications- Media, Advertising, PR, Radio & TV Fitness/Health/Food India Biographies/Autobiographies & Memoirs Reference books/Dictionary/Thesaurus Business/Economics/Investments Commentary Self-help/DIY Parenting /Family Language & Writing /Plays/Quotations Humour Novels Classics Photography School year books/college catalogues Agriculture It is easy to see my areas of interests.

Diary of a reluctant swimmer

Sometime in February, while on a break from work, I decided to get over and done with one of the items on my life's "to do" list. This is the abridged diary that I kept ..... Monday As I prepare to go for my first 3.00 pm appointment with my swimming instructor, a whole 39 years late, I keep wondering to myself, “why did I have to wait this long?” I have no concrete answers, but it was not a lack of opportunities having attended two schools that had pools and that took the time to introduce their students to swimming. Unless you are a very close family member, you will not know that I am not an avid swimmer. I have in my albums, photos taken in varying poses of simulated swimming- you see me waist deep in the blue Indian Ocean and various other masses of waters including bathtubs, rivers, dams and lakes. I even possess a few taken during a white-water rafting escapade in the Sagana River. The desire to learn this life skill was always there, and as the years came and went, the constant entry on my annual To Do List has been “learn how to swim”. But beyond making the entry, there was no further effort. The day of reckoning would be postponed decade after decade. I soon got married and got two kids who acted as an impetus for my swimming wishes. After all, what kind of father would I be if I couldn’t make a heroic dive to save any of my babies should they face a trying moment in the waters? But alas, eight years later, my seven year-old son is an accomplished swimmer bravely joining the rarified ranks of deep-end swimmers, while his three-year-old sister has graduated from the “baby” pool to the shallow end of the “mother” pool. So today, I will take the first bold step towards rectifying all that. I have paid for 10 lessons (the coach says that I don’t need that many, but no harm in improving my competence to national team potential!). When I get there, the first lesson is to submerge in water in the relative safety of the tightly clenched rails. The instructor insists that I go under water completely. It is hard staying under water, it feels like am being pulled upwards. On the third dip he wants me to open my eyes while under water. Wow! I can see under water. On the fourth dip he wants me to breath out while under water. Wow! I can hear the amplified echo of the bubbles in the water. Lesson two is (still clenching the rails) the dead man’s float. Facing downwards and hands and feet stretched out, I learn that the natural response of my body is to float. I also learn that to stay afloat, little action is needed since the human body is slightly less dense than water. Just relax-forget your unpaid bills, the pending school fees balances and Kenyan politics. Floating is such a sensation! The weightlessness is a new experience for me. I am glad that I got through the first lesson without taking an unscheduled drink! Tuesday Having learnt how to float, the day’s lesson is how to propel oneself in water. I am now confident enough to leave the rails and move five feet into the pool. From that distance I am requested to float towards the rails. It takes an eternity before I get to the rails and almost panic. The next lesson is how to kick the legs from the waist downwards to assist in the movement. By the end of he hour I am confident enough to start from the middle of the pool towards the rails by first gliding and then kicking to the rails. Wednesday I am exited and looking forward to the day’s lesson which is How to stop in water. So far, the rails have been my anchor and comfort zone. From the floating position, bringing your hands down and bending your feet upwards towards the chest ensures that that you brake and find yourself standing in the water. It’s a milestone lesson. With this knowledge, my instructor says I am ready to move away from the rails towards the center of the pool! Indeed I complete two widths of the pool by floating, gliding, kicking and stopping halfway for breath and repeating the same to the opposite end. This must be the most important day for me- the fact that I can move from one end of the pool to the other is the landing-on-the-moon –moment for me! Thursday The fact that I report for my lesson earlier than the appointed time is a sign that my enthusiasm is bubbling over. Today I am learning the human stroke by extending one arm, bringing it down and back to a point directly below the shoulder, then lifting it to a position just below the surface of the water. The process is repeated with the other arm. After about four attempts, it dawns on me that the honeymoon is over and the hard work starts. This stroke is difficult and I get out of breath too soon. The instructor assures me that am doing all right, but I don’t feel it. The co-ordination of kicking legs, hands stroking and still keeping the head under water and parallel to the water surface is taking its toll- I think I have over exerted the hip bone ligaments because I leave the pool with a sharp pain around the groin and lower back. Seems to me like the fun in this swimming experience has been taken out today. Friday The groin is aching on the left, making it hard to lift the leg up. The lower back is also feeling sore. At 3.00pm. I conveniently dig my archives for a fitting excuse! I pick the one about muscles and sporting injuries needing a day or two to recover or heal. I like it and I have no trouble filling the rest of the day with other activities after I adequately convince the small voice in my head that tomorrow is another day! Saturday The groin is not aching anymore, but the back has taken the pain baton eagerly. I will make a better assessment as the day grows. However, the afternoon comes and I think yesterday’s excuse has not fully withered and can serve another one day! After all, why stress the body before a full recovery. Tomorrow is another day after all. Sunday With the back now full recovered, I have run out of appropriate excuses and must go for the fifth lesson. It feels good to back in the water and I start by refreshing myself with all the lessons I have learnt so far. One week later, I am yet to master this one single swimming style and despite numerous repeats, it seems like I will not be getting this right, which leads to frustration. Until I can perfect the hand movement, I will not move to the next lesson my instructor says! All round me, I see portly men and women gliding with ease from one end to the other. I admire them and wish I could match their kind of proficiency. Today my son has accompanied me. The pool is a bit deserted save for three young girls who are playing loudly. This is my seventh lesson and with three more to go before the target of ten, the end is not far. I continue with the breathing practice. Swing the two hands at least three times before exhaling in the water and through the mouth. Hold out for as long as you can and with the left hand at the waist level, turn the head sideways and gasp a mouthful of air before continuing to the right hand after a similar count. I get the rhythm here and there, but it’s not consistent. My son also serves as the impetus to ensure that I get it right. He wants me to “race” with him across the width, and though he realizes that I am quicker due to my longer limbs, he pushes me to take at least ten widths. The more we race the less the pressure for me to breath right. The motivation shifts to ensuring I reach the other end quicker which works well because I realize that suddenly am able to take in two mouthfuls of air midstream though I am not able to sustain the hand’s movements for too long. Along the way, I get my first muscle cramps, but also get a breakthrough in doing the width without stopping midstream, with only two well-executed air refills along the way! Finally. Thank you God! I bid my instructor goodbye with satisfaction. He assures me that there are a whole lot of new things to learn about swimming including new styles that can fill the rest of my living days. I may not make the national swimming team anytime soon and I may end up being the awkward and struggling swimmer fighting with imagined turbulence as seen in pools countrywide, but I will always be grateful that I took the initial step and plunged in my shallow corner of the pool.

Good to be back

It has been awhile since I last posted here. Being away was terrible. I had acquired the blogging bug and being kept away would naturally have some withdrawal symptoms. I feel bad for misleading a number of my friends and probably any number of fellow bloggers that I would be sharing my thoughts and takes on life at regular intervals: but alas! TIA; This Is Africa- the place where one minute you are online, the next you are not. It may be any of a myriad of reasons- power blackout, power spike, internet connection failure or as in my case, a secondhand laptop dying on you. Since I prepared my posts during my leisure hours, I could no longer continue the flow. That is my story. The laptop crushed on me, complete with a whole lot of my projects. Thanks God for some unconscious back-ups on my office PC, I salvaged a bit of my age-old stuff. It was a lesson well learnt. I was just shopping for an appropriate domestic internet connection when this happened. It set me back a while and now I have to start by replacing the laptop, hopefully with a new one. My blogging journey will have to go on, though. In the next few days, I will post some of the pieces I had put away......... ....everything must go on above the din of life.......